Due to the circuit breaker in Singapore, I have decided to search for book recommendations to read at home. I came across a YouTube channel called Jenn Im. She is Korean American and she posts about lifestyle advice and vlogs. She recommended one of the books in her video. “Daring Greatly: Vulnerability transform the way we live, love, parent and lead” by Brené Brown. It made me pondered. “How does vulnerability affect our life positively?”
Many assume vulnerability is a weakness including me. According to the author, Mrs. Brown, vulnerability described as the core of all emotions and feelings. To believe vulnerability is a weakness is to believe that feeling is a weakness. To neglect emotional feelings out of fear that it will hurt us is to prevent us from having purpose and meaning to life. I couldn’t agree more with the statement. To be honest, I strongly believed that being perfectionism in life would draw recognition from people including my family. I am a person who works extremely hard to achieve goals especially in the academic aspect. Being a typical Chinese girl in a Chinese family, education is important. Nevertheless, the book explained that perfectionism is a form of vulnerability armory. I was astonished by this idea.
It never occurs to me that perfectionism is a negative trait because many believe it is one of the important qualities in career prospects. I started to agree with the author upon reading it. Based on experts, perfectionism defined as “a combination of excessively high personal standards and overly critical self-evaluations”. People tend to protect themselves from being hurt, ridiculed, and being disappointed (the discomfort of vulnerability) by hiding behind this armor. It makes them feel safe and stronger. They tend to overwork themselves, sacrificing themselves for others to their limits yet, they never feel enough. In the end, beneath this armor, frustration and disconnection could be felt.
Inner voices also play important roles that negatively affect mental health. In my case, the inner voices would be like “Just give up. It will never work” or “You don’t have what it takes” or Don’t waste your time”. They lingered within my head with discouraging words. Eventually, I start to doubt myself. Upon reading this book, I realized how powerful vulnerability is to me. It allows me to think about how important to be aware of my feeling and limits. It is fine to be vulnerable in front of people because this is me. It takes courage to be vulnerable and it is the truth. It encourages me to take off my armor and let myself be seen and to believe that I am enough.
At this moment, a connection can be felt and it would indirectly attract people who could accept who I truly am. This is just one of the topics I love the most. However, the author also focuses on leadership and parenting which might be useful for those who are working and/or being a parent. I love how the author shared her personal stories to show how certain subjects are portrayed which mostly relatable to the readers.
Please leave comments below if you have any inspirational books which you would like to share. I would give it a try! I’m currently reading 48 Laws of Power by Robert Greene. Tell me how you think about this book.